some examples of legalese

Example 1: Legalese and bad arrangement obscure meaning on the critical question: Who can be a member? The original version From Thobelani Community Property Association constitution In the original constitution the sources of information on membership are scattered. Clues to the meaning are shown in bold. Clause 3.1.7 "Membership register" shall mean the register to be established and maintained by the Management Committee, of participating members who shall be the persons eligible to vote at the General Meeting of Members of the Association. Clause 3.1.8 "participating members" shall mean the rightful participants in the land acquisition project designated as such in terms of Clause 10.1 and whose names will be reflected in the Membership Register. Clause 9.1 Households eligible to apply for benefit from the assets, resources and projects of the Association shall comprise of the families whose applications for a settlement grant has been approved by the Department of Land Affairs. The said participating members shall be registered in a membership register as such. Clause 10.4 The head of each household, registered in the Membership Register, has voting rights and therefore is the participating member. Simplification involved finding the clues and drawing them together, before writing them in plain language. Note that as there is no other sort of member, there is no point in calling a member a "participating member". The simplified version 4. Membership of the Association 4.1 The heads of households whose applications for a settlement grant were approved by the Department of Land Affairs are members of the Association. 4.2 The names of members shall be listed on a membership register to be kept up-to-date by the committee. Having done all this work, LEAP would comment that this sounds to us like a manufactured concept of membership rather than one people hold on grounds.

Example 2: Unnecessary words The original version From Thobelani Community Property Association constitution Clause 8.1.8 of the original text, under POWERS OF THE MANAGEMENT COMMITTEE, consists of 84 words and reads: "To employ staff, agents and other people (either casually, temporarily, permanently or on secondment) to carry out the objects of the Association upon such terms and conditions as they may from time to time consider desirable, and to terminate such employment or agency, and to pay their salaries, fees, commissions, remuneration and other charges out of the Association's Fund and to confer upon any staff or agents so appointed the right to exercise any discretion which may be vested in the Management Committee Members." All that is necessary can be done in three words. Employment involves job description, remuneration, the power of the employer to dismiss etc, so the embroidery is unnecessary. The clause might just as well have gone on to require application of the Basic Conditions of Employment Act and that the dismissal may not be unfair...! The simplified version 10.8 To employ staff.

Example 3: Even more unnecessary words The original version From EMSI Trust Deed 7.3 The Trustees are hereby vested with the general powers to all such things as may be necessary or conducive to achieve the objects of the Trust, subject to the terms, conditions and limitations set forth in this Trust Deed, directions contained in resolutions passed by the members in General Meeting and the provisions of the Act. And later in the same document: 29. Discretion Save as herein before otherwise stipulated, where discretion are vested in the trustees hereunder, such discretion shall be complete and absolute , and any decision made by them pursuant to such discretionary powers shall not be challengeable by any member or any other person affected thereby, provided the trustees conform to the main objects of the trust and to the other terms, conditions, and principles of this Trust Deed. Hereinbefore? Hereunder? Pursuant? Challengeable? In the plain English version, we had mentioned the Act once already, under establishment, and other parts of the plain English version dealt with the limits on the powers of Trustees. We had assumed that the Trust Deed would be read as a whole. The simplified version 13.3 The Board of Trustees shall have all those general powers necessary to achieve the purposes of the Trust and to carry out decisions made by a general meeting of members.